December 1 — Having Had a Spiritual Awakening
“It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day…” — Nina Simone
Having had a spiritual awakening… I chased that line like it was some magic password that would unlock sobriety. Every meeting I went to, every story I heard, I was listening for that one moment where the sky cracked open and angels high-fived me. It just didn't happen like that for me.
I don’t even know what happened in my own recovery. I just kept coming back, sitting my butt in the chair, and trying to keep an open mind about this whole not drinking thing. That’s it. No fireworks. No secret handshake. No guru moment. Just showing up when everything in me wanted to create excuses to skip a meeting.
I kept hearing about this “psychic change” that removes the desire to drink, but I’d never had one before, so how the hell was I supposed to learn it? Eventually I had to trust the process — which is a fancy way of saying “stop fighting and keep walking.”
Then one night… boom. Something shifted. Maybe I had one too many cups of AA coffee. Maybe I was honest one too many times. Maybe it was one too many prayers. Maybe I overdosed on that acceptance page in the Big Book. Who knows. All I know is: on Sunday I was still wanting a drink… and on Monday the desire was gone.
Gone.
And it hasn’t come back.
Wild stuff. No logic to it. No formula. Just grace disguised as another boring day in recovery. Sometimes the awakening isn’t big — it’s quiet, sneaky, and shows up after you’ve already given up trying to feel anything spiritual.
But it’s real. And it keeps you sober.
What was your ‘Sunday I still wanted to drink, Monday I didn’t’ moment?
