I once heard someone say in a meeting, “Sex is good, but nothing is better than crossing that last name off your amends list.”
That may be one of the more enthusiastic descriptions of Step Nine ever offered in a folding-chair environment. It is funny because the relief can be difficult to explain to someone who has never carried an amends list.
Crossing off a name does not mean the other person forgave us, the relationship was restored, or the past disappeared. It means the mistake was no longer being carried only as a secret, fear, or unfinished piece of business.
The Ninth Step Promises describe freedom, peace, usefulness, and a changing attitude toward life. Apparently somebody in that meeting decided all of that deserved a very strong comparison.
What changed inside you after an amends you had feared for a long time?
