“You’ve got to give what you take.”— Freedom! ’90, George Michael
When we first came into AA, many of us were suffering from a hopeless state of mind and body. We didn’t always know it—we just called it life.
It wasn’t like one day things were fine and the next day everything fell apart. Problem drinking can work slowly, like Chinese water torture—one drip at a time—until the problems pile up so high we can’t see a way out.
For a lot of us, the real question showed up just seconds before walking through the door of our first meeting: What’s going to happen to me?
In that moment, we imagined so many possible outcomes. The only thing we knew for sure was this—we were exiting the roller coaster ride of drinking, and that felt like relief.
Even if it wasn’t clearly understood at the time, something deep down inside finally sparked up and said, You’re about to get some help. You’re not alone anymore.”
Looking back, can we admit that it wasn’t just a small spark—but an overwhelming sense of hope, love, and security that had been buried deep inside us, rising up to keep us safe no matter how small we want to remember it?
In the rooms, we found people who had been there. People who understood us. People who cared enough to keep coming back and share their experience with us. As the hope we found in the rooms began to match the courage it took to walk through the door in the first place, we found the strength to say to ourselves, "I can do this too.”
Do you remember the moment you realized, “I can do this too”? What helped that thought finally stick?
