“Your a black sheep — not because you were mistaken, but because you chose to be different in a world that often fears what it can’t understand.” — found on Facebook
Some of us grew up feeling like square pegs in round holes. Odd ducks. Black sheep. Always a little out of step and uncomfortable in our own skin. We don’t always know why — it just is what it is. Our default setting has usually been: you don’t know me, followed closely by go away.
When we first got to AA and started hearing other people talk about that same feeling, it stopped us cold. For too long we thought we were the only ones wired like this. Then it hit us — what if all the black sheep ended up in the same room? We might not be the biggest herd, but at least we’re together. And for a lot of us, that was the first real peace we’d felt in a long time.
At some point, one of us finally said out loud what we’d been thinking: “I just want to be normal.”
A woman at the meeting shot back, “Normal? That’s a setting on a washing machine. You’re on the other setting — agitate and spin!”
Then she laughed. Hard. And we laughed too — because it was true.
Before we walked away, she said something that stuck: “I hope you find a God of your own understanding that solves your problem.”
We nodded and said, “Yeah… me too.”
That’s how it started for a lot of us. Not with lightning bolts or certainty — but with a scavenger hunt. Little pieces of Powerful moments here and there that made sense to us. Bits of truth picked up along the way. It wasn’t perfect. It wasn’t polished. But it was enough to keep seeking.
What if the point of a Higher Power isn’t getting it figured out — but staying willing to keep looking, even when we don't like what we find?
